Are we not all the same?


The road ahead made sense in your head. But now, it makes you feel dumb, innit?

I know. I know. And I don’t have any motivational words for you now. I just want you to know that you are not alone in this.

There is something about our pains and how they stem from our individual experiences that makes us feel like we are alone on this hazardous road.

You want to earn your living as an artist, but your dad commands you to take a role as a Secondary school teacher, so you can have something on your CV before NYSC comes.

You want to take your time and get over emotional issues and trauma before a relationship, so you don’t end up being toxic to your partner, but your culture hardly every acknowledges emotions.

You want to be productive and get good work done in time, but there is something about scrolling through Instagram reels. I mean, how do you resist the sight of blue skies and seas, or cute cats?

You have your own shortcomings, but what makes this worse is that you had it all planned out, and it made sense when you were about to start. You’d take that course online, then you’d download samples of “expert portfolios” online to model yours after. Then, you will get on Linked-In and get at least an entry-level role –even if you have to send 10 applications a day. All these should take about a month or two, but you are 5 months away now, and you are still stuck in the boring side-hustle you wanted to do for only a short while.

Your friend bought a course and that’s how he landed the connection that got him a new job. You saved every penny and bought a course too, but the trainer turns out to be a very persuasive scam. Now, everyone has gone ahead of you and you are just left alone in this pit of stagnancy or nothingness. I think the “nothing feeling” might even be worse. Because, you don’t know what you are dealing with. Almost like an unknown hand shaping your emotions from behind shadows.

It’s hard. And there are words I could say to motivate you. You can be more diligent too. Speak to someone. Go back to the board and draw the plan again.

However, in all you do and think? Don’t forget that I only know these things because I am here too. You are not alone. In fact, this chaotic pit is overcrowded – and we can only hope as we help each other out.

Written by Ogundeji Theophilus. 

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