The Writer’s Reformation by Bamidele Toluwatounfunmi

 

I had written poems  
I had written songs
I had written of love that I never truly felt
I had written of emotions that weren’t deeply rooted
I had written over a hundred truths and lies, all communicated 

I got lost and found again
Renewed, reformed, but not in every way
So my writings, my core, no longer felt the same
Their foundation had been shaken, broken and thrown away
I was to become one with He who had redeemed me
But my spirit man, newly rekindled, was consumed by confusion
How do I get used to my new reality, which to my natural mind seemed to be superstition?  


I began to search for a way to truly let go of what is old and let the “New man” grow  
A desperate search for a connection to the new inspiration and source of my creative “flow.”
Oh! That this gift, my unique form of worship, remains of value to He who gifted
But, that which a man roams about in search of is deeply rooted in his spirit and soul
Spent in the place of tefillah, in hopes that all my being is truly submitted
Exposed to the overt secrets of the Torah, it all became clearer
For my new man to actualise purpose, he needs to be deeply rooted, unwavering, ever lighted

Leviticus 6:12 a part of the scripture in which I randomly delve
Reveals the instruction given to I AM’s chosen priesthood for an acceptable offering
“The fire on the altar shall be kept burning.”
Light bulb switched on, realisation begins to dawn
For me to be truly transformed, to draw closer, to have my writings worship and serve  

I should let assiduity, doggedness and tenacity lead me to submission  
Not to self, but to the one who has reformed me
Oh, let the fire on my altar of communion, reverence and service forever burn!
Let me remain in persistence, pertinacity and perseverance  
So “he who is at work in me both to will and to do” will work His perfect way through me 

Now I have found a new drive, a reason to write, a reason to breathe, and a reason to die
“For a man hasn’t truly lived unless he finds what to die for.”
My core, finally being replaced, foundation rebuilt
What do I write if I don’t tell of your truth?
The fulfilment of your promise of love and life eternal
I will tell of the reconciliation of man back to his source
The reconciliation of man back to true love made possible through the worthiest sacrifice
Oh! I will tell of the reconciliation of man back to God
I will tell a new story of truths as a writer that has been reformed by your word.   

 

 

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