5 First Date Questions for Christian Singles

Hey singles who are ready to mingle! This one's for you! And when I say mingle, I mean people who are ready to settle down in a godly relationship. 

As a Christian, you may find troubles with going on a date either because you don’t want to seem boring, too forward, or too inquisitive - but guess what? It’s okay to feel that way, however, it is not okay to let those feelings stop you from going on dates.

Today, I will be writing about a couple of questions that could be interactive and would also set the tone for a nice date while giving you information about what you want.

Yes, what you want. Nobody wants to waste their time going on dates that will eventually lead nowhere. With these questions and the tone in which responses are being made, you will definitely get your answers.

To start this off, always have this at the back of your mind, no matter how perfect their answers are; always ask God for wisdom and trust him to make a good decision for you. The first question would be a little background about the person, just to ease into the whole conversation. Normally, I would advise you to start off the conversation yourself first, then tell the other person to do the same.

For instance, I am Naomi, a 25-year-old accountant who loves to sing. On weekends, when I'm not balancing sheets, you can find me singing in church. I am also a lover of God, and I am the middle child of four children. Then you say, and you?

What this does is to ease the tension and also give the other person a template for how he or she should answer the question. With this, the date is off to a good start. Then, you can go ahead and ask about his or her family based on the response.

What's your family like? For me, I come from a highly religious family. My parents treat all children equally, and me, my siblings, and my parents are practically like friends. Every last Friday of the month, everyone makes sure they go to the family house for our monthly get together; it brings us together. What about you? What's your family like? Then, when the person responds, you can continue the conversation and link it to knowing what his spiritual level is like.

You can start off with something like, One of my favorite memories as a child would be Thanksgiving Sundays in church, when we got to sew new clothes to wear to church. I always loved it because, you know, every child loved that new cloth feeling.

What about you? What was church like for you? This is a straightforward question; after asking it, if the response is not sufficient to tell you about his or her spiritual life, you can follow up with a question about the person’s faith.

When asking about the faith of the person, do not try to be self righteous or condescending in your manner of approach. It can be as simple as asking. On a scale of 1-10, how much of a Christian are you? Or on a scale of 1-10, how well do you believe in God? As simple as these questions are, you’d be surprised at how eye open they will be. If the person says, "Uh, maybe a five or six," you can now proceed and say, "Well, for me, it’s an 8 or a 10/10. You can dig a little deeper and say, "Why is it so low?" or "Do you care to share why you gave it a 5?" That can start another conversation. When you are satisfied enough with the response and follow up conversation from that question. 

You can move on to the topic of the kind of family he wants. Trust me, you need to know this. It is easy to weed out people who are not serious with all these questions. You can start off by asking if he or she would like a relationship like their parents' or what exactly they want in their relationship. If there is time, you can ask about deal breakers and other minor stuff you would want to know.

One way to make the person open up is to always start off with yourself and later give room for the person to talk. 

The last question you should ask is about the person’s hobbies and how he or she unwinds with his or her friends. Through this, you will get to know how entertaining the person is. You will also get ideas for planning the next date if you decide to continue based on the responses. 

This question is a little bit relaxed, and it is a fun way to end the date.

Let’s do a quick run down on the questions again;

Firstly, you need to understand that you are not a hiring manager and the person is not here for an interview. So, you've got to have conversations and not just start questioning the person. If you do so, there may not be a second date, and it will likely leave the person walking on eggshells.

Question one:  A quick background because, duh! Everybody wants to know who they are getting involved with.

Question two: What is your family like? Well, the foundation of a person’s character is mostly dependent on the way he or she was brought up.

Question three: The person’s spiritual level must be tested a little, and I don’t mean by telling them to speak in tongues or what not.

Question four: What’s your ideal kind of relationship? It is good to know this, so you’d know deal breakers and all. This let’s you know if that will be the end of the relationship or if you will want a second date 

The last question is to ease off the date and kind of connect to the fun side of the person. So, you will be asking about what the person loves doing in his or her spare time.

All these questions are necessary because, even apart from the answers, their reactions will also give them away. That is why you have to stay vigilant when asking questions like this.

To close this off, always have this at the back of your mind, no matter how perfect their answers are; always ask God for wisdom and trust him to make a good decision for you. Do not ever depend on your understanding; always depend on your guide, the Holy Spirit.

That will be all for today. I hope you enjoyed the read.

Let me know what you think about this in the comment section.