Christian Poetry: a minute to spare

A lot of time has passed like water under the bridge. My memory can't seem to recall the last time I called to you. I messed up; made a mess of a message you carefully put together.

‎Father told me; Mother didn't hold back to hold up my ears for your laws to sink in, but as seeds in a fruit, foolishness was bound in my heart, and the rod of discipline I hardened my heart to. I loved them but their lawful lullabies, I loathed.

‎So, I fell in love, with her - it felt convenient I needed not a conviction; it felt safe I needed not counsels. The sight of her brings to life the butterflies in my belly. When she called my name - Samson - my heart beat faster than the speed of light. Her soft hands made tender my tensed tendons. But it ended; my beloved in the arms of a lover.

‎This time, not love but lust - I spent on her, the night and myself, in her chambers. My body in hers; her body with mine, an unequal yoke with a seed of Belial.

‎I lost lust to find love, in her, Delilah. Like currencies, my nights I spent with her; on her, by her side. Her body in my arms - fire in my bones. Her voice, a choice I made to be a song in my ears, in my heart, in my mind every tick of a clock. 

‎My love lulled me to sleep and I slept with seven locks of hair, the pearl You gifted to me; to us; to them, on her lap. I arose from her lap like other times but never like other times - the choice had departed from the chosen.

‎Dear God, if You can hear me, can you spare me a minute of Your attention? I laid out my pearl before a pig on make-up and jewelry of gold and silver. I cast the holy thing before dogs clothed in wool and silk. I have wronged You. I have wronged myself. I have wronged us. I have wronged them. I dined with error and despised the table of truth. 

‎My Lord, have mercy on me. The light of my body has been gouged out like bulbs from their sockets. The agony, sharp, aching like a thorn piercing my foot. Remember me again, my Lord, and teach me to remind myself of who You are; Your person and Your promises. Amen.

‎#Judges 14-16, Proverbs 22¹⁵, Matthew 7⁶